Thursday, September 27, 2012

Bad Blogger

I just want to put it out there that I am not good at blogging.  I am not Oprah worthy or pinterest worthy or "guest blogger for Cosmo" - worthy.   I do not have a niche except for the oh-so-broad pastor's wife/mother of boys/regular person.  If I ever developed a readership, most likely it would just be people who like me, like my friends, or my mother.

There are some distinct differences between me, and your average "Good Blogger."  Let me name a few...

Good Bloggers (GBs) use really awesome photos of things to pull you in, and often use instagram to transform sort of regular looking things into extraordinary, artsy, magazine-pages worthy, way cool things.  When I search the web, if a blog doesn't have a photo, then my attention span just doesn't get me past the opening line.  I mean, what good is a blog if you cannot "pin it" ?

Bad Bloggers (BBs) like myself, do not have an actual working camera at the moment, use their phone to take photos but lack the ability to zoom in on things, and are digitally challenged and are still in the process of figuring out how to upload photos onto the blog site.

GB's know their niche, and often have a really cool blog site with lots going on visually, and they have put some thought into how the page is designed.

Bad Bloggers use all the free templates for their site, and change it sometimes daily on a whim and just push buttons until something looks okay.  They also do not have a niche, and therefore draw someone in with a really funny story about a 5 year old one day, and then confuse them by writing about some profound spiritual epiphany the next.  And then even possibly talk about a good recipe but do not include photos of that recipe.

GBs are often detail oriented.  If they are going to talk about a craft project they did with their children, they will show step by step instructions (with photos) and if they make a puppet theater, they might actually sew curtains, print up "Ben's Puppet Theater" in a great font and individually cut out the letters and string them across the top.

A Bad Blogger might take an old box, cut out a hole, cut a scarf in half and drape it across a piece of string, with all the torn edged seams hanging, quickly scallop the top with a pair of dull kiddie scissors and then patch up any tears or holes with packing tape.  This is just an example of course.

If being a "crafty mom" were my niche, I would be a bad blogger.  I cut corners, don't yet know how to sew, I don't yet know how to make my own jam or grow my own vegetables, I am impatient with things, and don't know how to use "printables" off my computer.

If I were a "fashion-y 30-something," well, I would be a bad blogger.  I wear the same three outfits pretty much all the time (mostly because that's all I can fit into at the moment) and only brush my hair once every two days before I put it into a short-haired ponytail that sticks out straight from my head, and there my hair stays.  If I stood still, frowning, in front of an old barn or a VW bug, wearing boots and a scarf...well, let's just say even Instagram would not make me look cool.

I don't even have the pastor's wife niche down... a friend sent me a link to another pastor's wife site, and she sort of cusses and is EXTRA mouthy.  She talks about the denim dress wearing, ice tea drinking Pastor's wives.  I am not extra bad and I am not extra good - so is there a niche for someone in the middle?

If consistency is a mark of a GB, well, my one year absence from the blog-o-world should be enough to tell you what kind of blogger I am.

So here's the thing...I am a Bad Blogger.  But I really have fun doing it, since my mediocre skills have set a middle of the road precedent and there is no real pressure to keep Oprah happy (and the masses, of course).  Well I'm off (weak conclusion) and may write tomorrow, or next week, or next year (inconsistency), possibly about homeschooling, or wifing, or San Diego (no niche).  Signing off, yours, BB

1 comment:

Ryan said...

But "good writer" writes for herself. If you like to read what you write, so will we.... but you already know that.